I find it so hilarious that whenever someone tells me to let go, I get more and more angry. I just couldn't let go of The Grump today. I have nothing to be grumpy about.

Sat today before asana practice. I couldn't stop moving, couldn't stop opening my eyes, couldn't sit up straight, couldn't stop looking around the room. I was so not there it wasn't even funny. I just fucking annoyed by the time the teacher came into the room, which spilled over into my practice, and annoyance just turned to sheer anger and rage. I felt absolutely nothing throughout practice and several times, almost got up to leave. I didn't feel like practicing today, but went anyway hoping that I'd feel different after, and no. I don't know. Lately I've just been uninspired to sit, uninspired to practice, and uninspired to teach. I really hate these periods (although I must say they do turn me into a better teacher) and I'm grateful to have some time off next week after Wednesday. Of course, I'm hating the fact I'm not making money and hating the fact I ended up not being able to go home for Yanksgiving but downtime and a stay-cation in Toronto is perhaps what I need.

So today, I think I'm just going to be Angry Buddha. Tomorrow hopefully I'll be a different Buddha. And Ill try not to make my flow class this evening too intense, for the sake of my students. :P